Reflections on The Radical Road - Being known as Radical

Based on the sermon series The Radical Road: Abandoning Yourself to Follow Jesus taught by Mike Romberger, Senior Pastor, Mission Hills Church

Sermon Title: Get Ready to Meet a Radical – Luke 1:1-25

Mike began this series by defining the words “radical” and “abandon.”
According to dictionary.com, Radical means extreme, especially as regards change from accepted or traditional forms, or one who follows strong convictions or extreme principles. Abandon means to yield oneself without restraint or moderation.

With these definitions in mind, we could state that Jesus was a radical who abandoned himself to the will of God. And even though these two words don’t appear in scripture as descriptors of Jesus, they certainly apply.

The critical question is, Do these words apply to me? Or, What would it take for these words to apply to me?

Honestly, what are the words that others use to describe me, as best as I can tell? I don’t mean, what are the words I want people to use to describe me, but what do they really say? I’ll hazard to guess a few: Helpful, competent, confrontational, honest, and willing to take risks. But Radical? Abandoned? Probably not.

To be labeled radical today I’d have to go out and try to do something extremely different from what is normal, maybe selling my truck and adopting a walk-only mode of transportation so that I can give more money to those who need bus passes (not practical). To be called abandoned today, I should jump into something without restraint, like exercising till I drop from exhaustion (not likely). But I think that would be altogether missing the point.

Radical and Abandoned are not words we set out to establish as self-describing adjectives. They are the bi-product of life lived a certain way. They describe a pattern of living rooted in deep convictions. Jesus pursued the will of the Father without restraint, and as a result he lived an extraordinary life that was way beyond normal, conventional living. He was radical, not because he set out to be radical, but because he never let up in his pursuit to know and do what was right in the eyes of God.

And that should be my focus today. Not to live in such a way that merits a label, but simply to watch and respond to the opportunities that arise today to know and to do what is right in the eyes of God. And if I string together days, weeks and months of this kind of living, maybe these words will apply.

“Lord, I want to live a radical life abandoned for your purposes. But today, Lord, I just want to be aware of that singular moment that naturally arises which will force me to choose between the normal behavior of this world and what you would prefer for me. I believe, Lord, from your perspective that choice won’t be seen as radical, but simply the right thing to do.”

Airlines and Snowballs

I flew to Colorado Springs today. Yes, I live in Denver. Yes, it is a 15-minute flight wheels up to down. But, if your work requires you to travel at all, you know the value of achieving frequent flier status with your airline of choice. A kind lady from Denver-based Frontier Airlines called me last month just to let me know that I was going to be one leg short of reaching their top-tier flier status for 2012. Not one round trip short; just one leg, which she wasn’t pulling. So I came to Colorado Springs to have lunch and to knock out some of the email debris that piles up in my inbox. No meetings; just lunch at the airport before flying right back home.

Last night I lay awake thinking about the numerous trips this year that afforded me elite flying status on two airlines: Frontier and American. Madrid, London, Budapest, San Antonio (many times over), Spokane, Los Angeles, Portland, and Dallas, to name a few. I’ve long held a belief that achieving frequent flier status with an airline, in truth, may look like success on the road, but feels like failure at home. It means I’ve been away from my family a lot this year. A sacrifice that I have to question each time I consider another trip. Days away from the normal rhythms of family life - missed events, soccer games, church together. Sacrifice.

Then my Colorado Springs airport lunch took an interesting turn. Military veterans began arriving at the gate across from where I sat. Some in uniforms, most sporting veterans patches on their leather coats or hats. All carrying American flags. Since this city is home to the Air Force Academy, I assumed that this was a “welcome home” party for returning soldiers. I had to take a closer look.

Next thing I know I was holding one of those flags and my new friend, Jack “St. Thunder” Casey, was standing beside me. Along with many others, we formed a tunnel of flags from the exit of the jet-bridge into the terminal. Ladies held gift bags ready to hand out to those who were about to come up the ramp. Then word began to spread that the Snowball Express had arrived.

The Snowball Express? That didn’t sound like a troop transport plane. So I turned to Jack and asked, “Are these soldiers coming home?” He replied, “No, the soldiers died. This chartered American Airlines flight is bringing their families home. We sent them to Dallas for a weekend of recovery. They’ve been to Six Flags, Cowboy Stadium, and lots of other fun things.” As it turns out, every year, Patriot Guard units around the country round up these families and offer them a blessing in light of their sacrifice.

Sacrifice. That word surfaced again. On my trips, I’m gone several days, with the occasional two-weeker overseas. For these families, their soldier left knowing they would be gone for over a year. At the end of my trips, I come home to a family that welcomes me back. Their soldier didn’t return to their hugs.

I crawl into bed. They attended a funeral.

Yes, I travel a lot. Too much. But as I watched those kids and moms coming off the flight to a chorus of flag-holders saying, “Welcome home!” I’m reminded that some families won’t get to offer the homecoming greetings they waited to give. The gifts they received today can’t begin to compare to the loss they’ve experienced. Now that's sacrifice.

And the chance to give them a hero’s welcome today was worth that one extra leg on Frontier.

Now it’s time to go home.

For more information about the Snowball Express, click here.

For more information about the Colorado Patriot Guard, click here.

For other Patriot Guard units, click here.

Christmas Greetings from our family to you

Courageous and Fatherhood of God

For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Romans 8:1-16

I went with 7 other men last night to see the movie, Courageous. It is an excellent representation of the real-life struggles men face, acknowledging that life is hard and that we choose how we will face these challenges.

Several themes ran through the film, one being the enduring love that a father has for his children. Coupled with the sermon from our church this morning, based on the Romans verse above, I believe God was revealing something important in the hours of this day.

I have learned far less about God's fatherly love from the experience of being a son. Rather, I am learning about His love through the exercise of being a father to two children.

And I have come to this conclusion: If God's love toward me is anything like the love I feel toward my children, then I have greatly misunderstood his Fatherly heart. Like most boys who grow toward manhood, I've sought to earn and be deserving of His love - to live in a way that justifies His acceptance. To gain the respect of God the Father.

But I also know this: I love my children with unrelenting passion, unchangeable devotion and a sacrificial willingness strong enough to overcome most of the selfishness in my heart. To enjoy relating to them as their Daddy (Abba) is my delight.

If I, in my human frailty, can love my girls like this, then how vast is the love of God the Father for us? How strong is His love for me?

Today, if you know the love in your heart for a child, think on the magnitude of the Father's love toward you. His love is not a different kind of love. It is more and more of the same.

Allowing for Allowances

A Progressive Allowance Plan for Raising Children Who
Give Generously, Save Frugally, and Spend Wisely

"Dad, can I have an allowance?"
"Sure, son, I'll allow you to go get a paper route."

Times have changed. But the basic dilemma over whether to offer kids a monthly cash allowance has not. Let me start this discussion by saying that Laura and I have a stated goal of helping our kids grow into responsible, faithful maturity in all areas of life. We want them to head off to college with practical experience managing money so they can be financially wise and responsible, not held hostage by long-term financial damage or consumer debt.

Our hope is that, by the time they leave our home, our daughters will have learned basic money skills in three areas: Generous giving, frugal saving, and wise spending. How do we accomplish this?

Money Pits – The Problem with Allowances

Most parents view chores as an integral part of being in a family - everyone pitches in toward the healthy maintenance and overall well-being of the home. While this is a foundational approach, we should be careful with any system that ties allowances to specific chores. Doing so can shape kids who, when asked to wash the car, reply, "Well, for how much?" Monetizing basic responsibilities around the house is a sure-fire way to churn out kids who expect to get paid to be helpful.

Likewise, the historical data around unconditional allowances is no more encouraging. Regarding homes in which children receive an allowance without any expectations of responsibility, the data reveals that these kids…

Were no more likely to save money than those who received no allowance
Viewed the idea of working for money less favorably
Scored worse on a national financial literacy test
Show a lower participation in the labor force and an increased sense of entitlement.

So, if tying allowances to specific chores is as problematic as offering unconditional allowances, what else can a parent do?

Consider what we call a progressive allowance plan. The underlying principle is that a child’s allowance grows with the years in proportion to his or her ability to handle more responsibility.

Rather than tying allowances to chores, we frame it in the larger perspective of being part of our family system. To be in our family means that you share in the responsibilities of our home. Everyone pitches in. And everyone, in a basic sense, goes to work each day. Dad goes to the office, Mom handles home and local responsibilities, and the kids go off to school. And, as a result of everyone sharing the load, so too everyone gets to share in the blessings that God provides for our family. Everyone eats, sleeps with a roof overhead, wears comfortable clothes, and everyone gets a bit of the financial bounty that comes into our home from the Lord.

In order to keep the ideas of responsibility and blessing tethered, we withhold our daughters’ allowances if we felt that they were not contributing appropriately to the family. By doing so, we avoid the situation whereby our kids shirk their responsibilities at school and home, but they get the same allowance regardless. We also resist an allowance plan that would lead us to say, “You washed the car but you didn’t clean your room, therefore you only get 80% of your allowance.”

The Progressing Allowance Plan in Action

How does a progressive allowance plan work? With each year, starting in 1st grade, our kids had some basic responsibilities around the house in addition to their schoolwork. Making beds and feeding the dog are simple tasks within the scope of a 6-year-old. In return, our kids got an allowance of $10 per month that year.

While that may seem like a lot to give a 6-year-old, we required them to give at least one dollar at church, and to put at least one dollar in a savings account. (Remember that teaching generous giving and frugal saving are two of our stated parenting goals.) We found it interesting that they consistently donated more than one dollar - and we didn't complain a bit! We want our kids to grow up with generosity in their hearts. For special offerings - like a donation drive at church for missions - we encouraged giving by matching whatever they chose to give, thus doubling their donation. On one occasion, both girls wanted to give to a China Missions offering. We laid out the fund-matching scheme, thinking they would give about five dollars each, and we would pitch in an extra $10 to match. We heard them upstairs counting money, giggling and talking about it with each other. How surprised do you think we were when they came down and announced that they wanted to give FIFTY dollars to China missions?! Well, we weren't nearly as surprised as the Children's Minister at the church when Molly & Claire showed up with $100 in cash! I pray to God that they will always be so generous.

Regarding the money that they save, we opened a savings account at our bank for each child and seeded it with a minimum balance. Each month they decide how much they want to deposit into long-term savings. Often this turns out to be two or three dollars, which is 100 - 200% more than we require of them. Some parents go further to encourage savings by offering a “fund matching” incentive for every dollar socked away. As their math skills have grown, we have been able to teach our kids about the cumulative benefits of saving. Of course, "compounding interest" is lost on them, especially with current bank interest rates! But they are experiencing the monthly discipline of saving which will benefit them for a lifetime.

Now, back to the $10 per month in 1st grade. If they give away $2 and save $2, then they really only have $6 to go out and spend. We have tried to give them full permission to spend those dollars anyway they desire. Why? Because they began the month by giving and saving. The rest is theirs to spend, earned, in a sense, by their responsible contribution to our family system. Of course this led to frequent trips to the Dollar Store where they bought countless “treasures” that broke in the car on the ride home. Did they learn anything from that? Probably not at the time, though we have heard them say, “What a piece of junk! I shouldn’t have wasted my money on that!” By giving them permission to spend the rest of their allowance as they desire, both girls have shown an increasing amount of discretion. This has opened the door for many conversations about wise spending.

The Mechanics of the Progressive Plan

Here is the "progressive" part of this allowance plan. When they started 2nd grade, we gave them each a $5 raise. Now, before you freak out over a 50% increase, remember that our goal is for them to learn financial responsibility AND to take on more financial responsibility over time. We’ve added chores to their list, and we’ve expected them to pay for more of the things that they want. Even in 2nd grade, if they really wanted a book from Barnes & Nobles, we would ask, "Do you have any of your allowance left to spend?" By giving them more spending potential, we gave them more responsibility for the cost of items they wanted. I don't think either girl ever questioned that we would take care of providing what they need, but they quickly learned that they would be asked to spend their allowance on items that they wanted.

Play this out over the course of a child's educational career - a $5 increase per grade - and what’s the commitment? By the time our daughters are high school seniors, they will each get a $65 monthly allowance. While this may seem like a lot, our girls will also shoulder much more of a load at home. Eventually they will be responsible for helping take care of the car, tend to their laundry, and participate in meal preparation for the family, among other things yet to be determined.

Regarding financial responsibility, their increased allowance will force them to make critical choices about discretionary spending. We will provide some basic money for reasonable clothes. If they want to upgrade to designer labels it will be on their dime. We will provide them with a basic line on our family cell phone plan, and they will pay for the texting or data plan on the phone. This notion of increased responsibility also means that they have to solve any problem that carries a financial burden. For example, our teens will have a modest car to drive, but if they wreck the car and the insurance premium goes up, they will pay the difference. If they get a speeding ticket (following in dear old Dad's lead-foot-steps) they will have to pay for it (even though dear old Dad did not :-).

The net result? Every month our kids will have to make spending choices, "Do I want to pay for that movie now, or would I rather save up for that new snowboard I want?" "Would I rather commit to a monthly texting plan for my phone, or have more flexibility in my clothes budget?" That is exactly the kind of choices we want them to learn how to navigate.

The First Bank of Mom & Dad

Structuring a progressive allowance system like this also opens the door to introduce our kids to basic concepts of banking. Eventually, I expect that each child will open a checking account and learn how to use a debit card. When that happens, we will teach them about online banking and checkbook balancing. We have started to offer higher-interest savings incentives and lower-interest loans.

Here’s how it works. If you child wants a new iPod, try giving them an incentive to save toward buying it. If it costs $100 and your child gets $25 a month of allowance, factoring in for giving and long-term savings with $20 of extra to spend, it will take your child 5 months to save enough. You can help them learn the value of delayed gratification by offering them a one-month interest incentive for saving toward that purchase. In other words, write out an agreement that if they choose to save toward the new iPod for four straight months, you will give them the extra $20 to make the purchase. We actually did this with Molly, our daughter who chronically blew all of her extra money at the Dollar Store. You can't imagine the celebration in our home when Molly got to buy her first expensive electronic toy. It is all hers, and she felt so proud over exercising spending discipline for so long!

On the other side of the banking equation, you can also encourage financial responsibility by offering low-interest loans. Let's say your son wants that “totally awesome” new bike. It costs $144, and he gets $30 per month allowance. Again, factoring for basic giving and long-term savings with $24 extra to spend, it would take him 6 months to save that much. Or you could structure a simple loan that allows him to save for two months ($48) as a down payment, and then pay out the rest over the next 4 months while he enjoys his new ride. Feel free to tack on any "bank interest" fee for him to pay during month 5 before closing out the loan! The best part about this situation is that if your son "defaults" on the loan, you can sell his bike on Craigslist and recoup your cash pretty easily.

What does a loan like this do? It opens the door for your child to learn basic banking concepts like down payments, loan payments, collateral, and that all-so important word - REPOSSESSION! By the way, be sure to put all of this in writing and have your child sign it so that when the Grim RE-PO man shows up and swipes their gear, you can lovingly remind them of the arrangement. Their future bank will certainly not be so kind.

Allowing for a Final Thought

In conclusion, let me simply say that we didn't come up with some magic formula that led us to start with a $10 per month allowance with a $5 per year increase. You can start out at a different amount and offer different adjustments. In the end, the basic premise stands; choose an allowance system that teaches your kids that with increased benefits comes extra responsibilities. And that, with each passing year, they can learn how to give generously from their own wallets, they can save frugally toward a future goal or dream, and they can spend wisely.

That's the kind of child we want to see going off to college.

Building your Bible Study

You are preparing to teach a Bible Study. If you are like many people, the anxiety that comes with public speaking can be downright debilitating. Far too many lose their essential message - and their audience - in the maze of poor presentation. But you don't need to take a preaching class to build a dynamic, memorable Bible study. Let's walk through some important "design" assumptions, and then a practical blueprint that will set your study on a solid foundation.

Assumption 1 - Attention Span
Consider the age of your audience from the outset. You approach Bible study with adult men differently than with a youth group. How long should your Bible study last? According to a variety of research, attention span can be linked to chronological age. So, if you're speaking to a Middle School audience, you can plan to teach for around 15 minutes. Go beyond that and you will begin to see the donut-glazed looks staring back at you. If your study has to be longer than your audience's age, then use the "Look" section to recapture some interest. More on that later...

Assumption 2 - Retention Span
Consider the learning style of your audience. Lectures still hold value for college educated adults, but fall on the media-addicted, youthful deaf ears. Be prepared to incorporate visual elements, audience participation, or video clips into your study. Learning experts agree that you increase retention by incorporating various stimuli. On this note, also remember the Primacy / Recency Effect (or Serial Position Curve), which states that people most often remember the first and last things that they hear. In other words, if you want your main point to "stick," state it clearly at the beginning and end of your study.

This is a good place to encourage you to keep your primary point simple and sharp. It is better for a crowd to hear one main point - thoroughly explored, illustrated and applied - than to hear 3 points that they completely forget. From the outset, ask yourself this question, "What main scriptural point do I want these folks to remember tomorrow?" Build the rest of the study around this thought or statement.

Assumption 3 - Divine Presence
A seminary preaching professor gave 4 anonymous sermons to his students to review and to rank in order of preaching mechanics and potential audience impact. One sermon landed at the bottom of every students' list, while the other three were debatable among the class. After a lively discussion, the professor revealed that the three sermons most preferred were delivered by ministers who were known to be morally corrupt, or cult-like leaders. The sermon which was unanimously ranked lowest was deliver by Dr. Billy Graham in a stadium address which saw thousands of listeners come to faith in Christ. The professor emphasized that divine unction, or the presence of God's Spirit in the life of the teacher trumps sermon mechanics or delivery style every time. Better that you would prayerfully walk with Jesus and have a technically poor presentation than for you to "wow" a crowd with your words without the Spirit flowing through your life.

Now, given these three baseline assumptions, how should you go about putting your Bible study message together? Let's use Lawrence Richard's helpful HBLT tool as the framework for our study. And we'll use the theme of "forgiveness" as an example of a Bible study message as we walk through each step.

1. Hook -
A good "hook" captures the attention of your audience, activates their prior learning, and heightens their anticipation for hearing what you have to say. Your hook should easily allow you step into your message by leading into your seminal statement. Tell a story or show a video clip and follow it with the very point you want them to remember. For example, if you're teaching on forgiveness, show a clip like this, and then make the statement, "Forgiveness is powerful. When withheld, it destroys; when given, it heals." Or use a discussion question that gets the audience involved in your subject. On the theme of forgiveness, ask, "Which is better, forgiveness or revenge? Why?"

2. Book -
After you state your main point, move straight into the scripture verse or passage that you want to study. It's okay to keep your scripture confined to a single verse as long as your point is in line with the larger context of the passage. Don't cite a verse just to make your point. The verse should make the point for you. For instance, Ephesians 4:32 is a simple verse on forgiveness. This is the time in your study when you define any important words that could be misunderstood, or you explain a bit about the context in which the verse was written. This Ephesians verse begs the question, "How can you describe the kind of forgiveness God offers to us in Christ?"

Opening scripture with your audience also ensures that if they forget every word you say, at least they have access to God's Word for a lifetime.

3. Look -
Now you will want to build a bridge between a scriptural truth and your audience's context. How does your theme translate into their experience? How has this message been misinterpreted by their culture? When, where and how do they relate to this concept? If you're teaching about forgiveness, you can offer an example to illustrate how forgiveness has healed and restored a relationship.

Remember the assumption about audience attention span. If your teaching time has reached the age of your audience, use an open discussion question, a video clip, a live testimonial from the crowd, or some other device to shake them out of listener-fatigue. This will buy you a bit more attention as you move toward the end of your study.

4. Took -
If you are teaching scripture with the goal of life-transformation, then you must include this component of application. The "took" is the take-away, or chance for your audience to consider what difference this truth will make in their lives. I will often end a Bible study by putting two questions to the audience (and often on the screen in front of them): What is God saying to you right now?, and What should you do about it? Allow your listeners time to listen to God before they transition to whatever is next.

Some people find closing their message to be the hardest part of teaching. Can you remember hearing someone teach who didn't know how to end? They go on and on and on, and you want to help them stop, but you can't! Know how you will end your message, and when you get to that moment, make your concluding statement with clarity and conviction. Remembering the Primacy/Recency Effect, it will help your audience to hear your seminal point one last time. And then say, "Let's pray."

Or if you are teaching on John 19:30, you could say, "It is finished." :-)

On leadership

The US President who solves our current debt crisis will be remembered fondly only by generations yet to come.

- D Callison, American Citizen